Plaything of the damned
Every parent has that one toy in the house that they’d put a mob hit on. For me, it’s called Alphabet Pal. And it’s purple. And chirpy. And a caterpillar. And vile. For… Read More
Tag Archive: two boys
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A nightmare on your street
If you live with a person who’s about two years old, you’re probably familiar with the weird things we say to get them to do things. Or, um, to stop doing things. And… Read More
Down at the toddler smorgasbord
I often hear mothers remark that they pretty much subsist by eating scraps of leftovers from the anointed ones, i.e., their tiny children, usually while clearing away small, sticky plates. Though I’ve never… Read More
Bugging out
Lately, the boys and I have had more offers to pet enormous hissing cockroaches than we can possibly accept. In my desperate attempt to entertain young males in the late summer, we’ve been… Read More
Everyone, get on the floor
At our latest visit to the pediatrician’s office, the patient in question decided it would be a good idea to swim around on the linoleum, under our chairs and under the desk. I… Read More
Two boys, one room
After months of The Elder sleeping with his feet off the bed, we decided to bump him up to a twin. Yes, we had a nearly 5-year-old sleeping in a toddler bed. He… Read More
Kid, get out of my hair
Raising kids can be a scary business. The latest manifestation of this, for me, has lately come in the form of hair pulling. Hard hair pulling, at close range, with an adorable, smiling… Read More
My toddler’s field work focuses on the upper Cretaceous Period
I have one of those rare 24-month-olds who’s already naming dinosaur species. “T. Wex!” he shouts. “Scared,” he mumbles, making his tiny mouth into his best little frowny face. What I fail to… Read More
Lightning McQueen fans packing heat
“Cars 2” is coming out this summer, to the delight of very little boys everywhere. If you’re unfamiliar with the movie, or with males under 3 feet tall, it’s a story about a… Read More
23 Months Later; or, Zombies Don’t Need Snack Cheese
The CDC nearly took down its own Web site this week when the excited masses learned it had featured a blog post about how to survive a zombie apocalypse. I’m one of the… Read More
